Welcome back to the podcast where we ask the question, what makes you happy?

My name is Jake Pearson and today we have with us a Sober Coach Janet Hadley, from Leeds, United Kingdom. Janet, how are you?

Janet Hadley  00:40

I'm very, very well. And happy. Thank you, Jake.

Jake Pearson  00:43

Fantastic. Well, let's wrap up the podcast right there. And thank you for coming on the show. Today we're going to discuss all things that kind of make you happy. And we had a little bit of a chat off screen just before we jumped on here. But really, let's start. Let's get into it. What does make you happy, Janet?

Janet Hadley  01:00

One of the things that makes me happiest is helping people to reset their relationship with alcohol. And seeing it the difference that it makes to people. I stopped drinking in the first lockdown in the UK, which was March, April 2020. It was a great time to do it. Because in lots of ways I didn't have to kind of go out and socialize or tell anybody. And honestly, I thought it was going to make me miserable. I did. I thought I did it for health reasons. I did it because I knew my relationship with alcohol, had got a little bit dark. And I thought I had to do it. And I could not believe how much happier it made me. It's changed my life completely. It's like coming out of a fog, of anxiety, and indecision. And just having clarity, having joy that I haven't felt since I was a child in doing ordinary things. I was so shocked at how much alcohol have been stealing my joy that- you know, I've become a sober coach. And I've working towards doing that as a full time job. And I've really changed my whole life.

Jake Pearson  02:16

That's amazing. And I love that you've gone from having that own very tough life experience to wanting to put yourself in a position to help others. Has that been something you've always done for people have you always been that person for other people in their lives where you've put yourself there to help them.

Janet Hadley  02:34

I'm always like a little bit of a mother hen [phonetic 02:35] in our team at work where people come to me for advice, and I do help people. I enjoy helping people. But I think in my personal life I've not really pursued doing that as much as I would have liked to, I think I've prioritized kind of earning money and chasing material things for too long in my life, which actually makes me feel a little bit sad when I think about it. But I'm glad that I've found something that has purpose, and been able to kind of make a few shifts in my life. Before it's too late. I've been reading a great book called The Five Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware, I think she's called. And she's a palliative care nurse, and she works with people who are in the last weeks and months of their lives. And they all say the same things. You know, I wish I hadn't worked as hard. I wish I'd pursued something that I love. I wish I'd kept in touch with my friends. I wish I hadn't cared so much about money. And it's very affirming to read that and think, yes, I'm on the right track doing my sober coaching.

Jake Pearson  03:46

Do you think that would tie into the advice you give our listeners here today about their own happiness?

Janet Hadley  03:52

Yes, I think sometimes alcohol can be a bit of an elephant in the well-being room. So I would definitely say, if you are really struggling to find happiness, don't think I'm saying that you have to stop drinking alcohol forever, because that's perhaps quite terrifying. And you won't want to do it. But maybe just give it a short break. You know, the classic is a month, I think 101 days-- I mean, that's my course that I teach. I think 101 days is a great target because it's enough time to have a proper reset. And you will have to go through some kind of special occasion without alcohol and that's where the reset really starts to bed in. But just give it a try- I would put money on the fact that it will make you feel better. I really want it [phonetic 04:45] whatever your position and pursue something that you love doing. Those of us who are lucky enough to get paid for doing something we love but never work a day in our lives.

Jake Pearson  04:56

Yes, fantastic. I really resonate with that advice. Especially the part where you forgot to get through a special occasion, when you're struggling with alcohol, and from personal experience when I was 20, 21 23, you know, trying to get through that. And all my friends wanted to do was drink and party and I'd show up and go, 'I'm not drinking' and they'd be like, 'Excuse me?' No, I'm not drinking, and then all of a sudden, 'I was drinking. And I was like, how? How did that? And when I finally got past that barrier, it was very incredible feeling.

Janet, thank you so much for coming on the podcast and sharing all things that make you happy. And that beautiful piece of advice there at the end too. And if you'd love to connect with Janet and learn more about the-- Was it 101 Day..?

Janet Hadley  05:44

101 Days to Sober.

Jake Pearson  05:45

Yes, you can do so by clicking the podcast episode description below. Check it out the link there. We'll put something there for you to go look at that as well. Janet, it's been an absolute pleasure. Thank you very much.